Hi again. Glad you took the time to drop by Parents R Us! Today for reference as well as laughs, I present to you a Parents Dictionary. I'm sure you'll recognize quite a few of the terms and you may even learn a few too.

-A-

Airplane - That thing parents act like to get toddlers to eat their carrots.

Alien - What you think invaded your home when your teen does chores on their own.

Apples - Fruit that is good for you. Usually passed by for something with sugar.


-B-

Bajillion - Number of times parents tell their kids to do something.

Bathroom - Everyone uses it but most have the idea (except for Mommy) that bathrooms clean themselves.

Because - A catch all reason parents give when kids ask "Why?"


-C-

Car - That thing your teen is always begging for.

China - paper plates

Cook - (see Mom)


-D-

Date - When Mom and Dad go out without the kids. Rarely occurs.


-E-

Ears - Kids keep a pound of dirt here.

Eating - Happens all the time except for at meals.

Energy - Mom has none, kids have plenty until time to do homework or chores.


-F-

Fables - Those tales teens tell to get out of various scraps.

Food - Answer of choice by parents when children ask "What's for dinner?"


-G-

Gum - Object attracted to both shoes and hair.


-H-

Hamper - Usually in the center of piles of dirty clothes with nothing in it.

Handy Wipe - Material closest to child's mouth.


-I-

Ice - Product of fiction. The ice tray is always empty. Strangely no one knows why.


-J-

Jeans - Clothing of choice for most kids

Junk - What's under your kids bed.


-K-

Ketchup - Favorite side of choice as well as most common stain in the house.

Kisses - Band-Aids from Mommy.


-L-

Lying - 50% of what comes out of your teens mouth.

Loser - The way your kids refer to their friends.


-M-

Makeup - Something mom's never use anymore and you forbid your daughter to wear.

Maybe - NO WAY.

Milk - Only consumed with large quantities of chocolate or sugary cereal.

Mom - (see Cook, Chauffer, Maid etc.)

MOMMMMM!!!!!!!!! - Frantic yell by a kid that wants something.


-N-

Naughty - Means Santa won't bring you presents.


-O-

Ocean - The state of the bathroom floor after family showers.


-P-

Pet - Wanted by kids - taken care of by parents.

Purse - Mom's bag of gear.


-Q-

Quietness - Myth


-R-

Refrigerator - Where your teen lives.


-S-

Screaming - Kids communication of choice.

Soap - All kids seem to be allergic to this.

Spoiled - Your kids after Grandma visits.


-T-

Teacher Conferences - When parents meet with teachers and find out about everything still hiding in your child's bookbag.

Towels - Kids idea of shower rug.


-U-

Underwear - Something kids often forget to change and run out of Sunday night at 10pm.


-V-

Vacation - Wishful thinking.


-W-

Wall - Drawing board for toddlers.

When Daddy Gets Home - Length of time until punishment occurs.


-X-

Xylophone - What every parents prays the grandparents won't get for the kids. (see Guitar, Drums, Musical Instruments)


-Y-

Yahoo - Exclamation of glee that the kids go back to school tomorrow. Also something most teens are addicted to.


-Z-

Zero - Amount of peaceful time parents have during the day.