Welcome back to Parents R Us. Today I want to talk specifically to moms, but guys feel free to read too. If you're a mom, more than likely you have particular ideas about what a mom should be. Maybe you're always trying to be the "perfect" mom and beating yourself up because you can never achieve that perfection you think you need to have. Part of your problem may be your idea of what a mom should be.

Most of us find ourselves being jealous of the mom down the street that seems to have it all together. She looks perfect, seems to balance everything perfectly, and we just don't think we'll measure up. What you probably don't know is that behind closed doors, that mom is just as frazzled as the rest of us.

The pressure is really on moms. Moms are supposed to know the right foods to feed the kids, the perfect stroller, the best activities for our kids, we're supposed to discipline our kids the right way, love them perfectly, and keep a household going smoothly. If we don't get everything quite right, soon we're calling ourselves a "bad mom," and worrying that our kids will never turn out quite right. Sometimes this comes from pressure all around us, like the media, movies, and books that talk about the "perfect" moms, and other times this pressure comes from our own expectations of yourself.

It's time to give yourself a bit of a break. We're going to look at some of the most common mommy myths out there and the truth behind them. You'll quickly realize you really aren't doing too bad as a mom.

Mommy Myth #1 - Great Moms ALWAYS Like Their Children
Big myth! Yes, you love your kids, but this doesn't mean you always like them. With all the challenges that come along with motherhood, there is no way you can be happy with your kids 24/7. It just won't happen. There are probably days you can't wait for bedtime so you can have some peace from them. It's not wrong to let your kids know when they aren't making you happy either. Don't suppress your feelings, but learn to handle them in a constructive way.

Mommy Myth #2 - Great Moms Immediately Bond with Their Kids
Most of us have the idea that the instant you have a child, you bond. It does work this way a lot of the time, but not every time. Many mother finds that they instantly bond with one of their children, but with other children it takes time for this bond to grow. Some women go through postpartum depression and find it difficult to find that bond. Don't worry. The bond will grow. Relationships take time, and this even includes your kids. This is true for step parents as well. If you become a step parent, don't expect to have that immediate bond. Trust takes time and the bond will take time, no matter how much of a mother's heart you have.

Mommy Myth #3 - Great Moms Can Balance Everything
We all know a mom that seems to balance everything smoothly. Her house looks perfect, she is balancing a great career, and her kids seem to act so well behaved all the time. It may look that way to you, but you're not seeing behind the scenes when she falls apart. You don't need to think that you can do it all, and you definitely shouldn't try to do it all. Interestingly enough, in other cultures, when a mother has a new child, other women band together to help her out. We definitely don't see this often in the U.S., and most of us think we just have to do it all on our own. You can't do it all! Realize it and come to terms with it. Sometimes your house won't look great, you may not always finish everything you want to, the grocery shopping may need to wait a day, and your kids won't always behave. It's okay. You're human after all.

Mommy Myth #4 - Great Moms Spend Lots of Time with the Kids and They Love It
Too many moms think they have to be there for their kids all the time. They try volunteering at school, going to every single game, helping out with field trips, and more. Moms need to realize that there can be too much of something great. Yes, your kids need your love and attention, but you can overdo it. Sometimes your kids are ready for a bit of independence. It's easy to try to do all these things to be with our kids, and then we really don't even spend quality time with them. Kids would rather have some of your time where you can relax, laugh, and enjoy being together. They won't enjoy it if your stressing out trying to man the punch bowl at their big school party, attempting to be at every game, and more. At this point, it becomes time that is not quality time because you're killing yourself. Spend quality time with your kids, but don't squash their independence.

These are only a few of the mommy myths out there that need to be dispelled. When we try to live up to myths, we end up stressing ourselves out. The best advice for moms is to try and follow your own instincts as a mom. Quit trying to be the "perfect" mom and just relax and keep trying to be the best mom you can be. Your kids will love this relaxed, yet imperfect, mom a lot more. You'll even teach them the lesson that they don't have to be perfect either - an important lesson for kids to learn!

Awhile back I asked several of my Facebook friends for some good parenting topics. One of the topics that came up was little boys and the important of a male influence in their life. I got to thinking about this idea, and although this is not quite on that topic, this idea was born from that suggestion - so thanks!

In a way, I do want to talk about the male influence in a boy's life, but I didn't want to gear this post just to dads, because I think this post is just as relevant for moms as well. The question I'd like to pose is simply, what do your kids see when they're watching you?

I have to tell you, there have been several songs that have led my thinking in this direction lately. There's Billy Currington's "Walk a Little Straighter," Rodney Atkins "I've Been Watching You," and a perhaps lesser known song by Phillips, Craig & Dean, called "I Want to Be Just Like You."

It's easy to get caught up in our life as a parent. We feed our kids, clothe them, make sure they're bathed, and a lot of times we're even able to get them the things they want to. Sometimes we tell them "yes," and sometimes we tell them "no." Our life becomes an endless motion on running in 50 different directions at once, all trying to make sure our kids have the great life we think they need.

While making sure our kids get the best we can give them in any way is definitely important, sometimes we forget to think about the image that we are portraying to our children. Perhaps while we run around trying to make things "better" for them, we actually portray an image that they don't need. Often we make mistakes with what we say, the way we act, and the things we do.

Although you may tell your child to do things, instill certain beliefs in them, and work to bring them up with moral values, it is more than your words that you must think about. After all, it is your actions that speak much louder than your words. Kids remember what mom and dad DO more than what mom and dad say. Tired of talking to your kids until you're blue in the face? Maybe it's time that you change the way that you act.

Now, I'll be the first one to proclaim that parents aren't perfect. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm not, and I'm definitely not going to achieve perfection in this life. I make mistakes, and I'm sure my husband and kids could attest to that. This is not what I'm talking about though. Everyone makes mistakes, and as a parent, you'll make your share of mistakes and more…but how do you handle those mistakes? Do you go back and apologize? If so, you're on the right track!

You'll never be a perfect parent. You'll make mistakes. Resign yourself to this fact. However, as a parent, I believe that we all are responsible for the way that we act. Although our children will come to a point where they are responsible for their actions, the responsibility of being a parent and influence on them is ours. So, once again I ask you, what do they see when they're watching you?

Enjoy the videos below too!

I would just like to welcome everyone back to Parents R Us. We know it has been a while since there has been anything talked about here, but I am going to remedy that right now. The last time we posted here Joy wrote the post, and it was for all of you moms out there. I think she had some great ideas about how to keep from losing your identities while being a full time mom.

Today we are going to talk about all of you dads out there and how important it is to not only take care of your family, but how to make sure that you also don’t disappear from yourself and your family as well. It is as equally important for us dads to not lose our identities as it is for our lovers and the mommies of our children. Fortunately I think it is a little bit easier for dads to maintain their identities than it is for moms.

Now we all know that part of a husband and a dad’s identity is providing for the family. Most of the men out there are the breadwinners. You have to pay the mortgage so that there is a roof over your family’s head. You have to put food on the table so that your family is healthy both physically and mentally. You have to put clothes on their backs so that they are cool in the summer, warm in the winter, and comfortable.

In order to maintain our own mental health, well being, and identity there are some things that us guys have to do for ourselves too. One thing we should all do is try to get a little alone time that has nothing to do with anything other than our own pleasure even if it is just going for a ride. In my case I like to go shooting sometimes because it relaxes me. I also like to skydive and surf when I get the chance.

Another way to maintain our own identities is to engage in a little romance or intimacy with the wife or significant other For the record I am not just talking about sex either, although that is also great…..and fun too. A candlelight dinner is a really fun way to show the one you love who and what kind of man you are. A late night swim or skinny dip with your honey in the pool or just relaxing in the hot tub is excellent too.

One of the best ways to keep your identity intact is by being involved in as many family activities as you can. Going to places like museums, zoos, or libraries with the family is great fun, and you all get to learn something and broaden your horizons. Going to shows or concerts is always good fun for family participation. Even something as simple as setting aside a day for family and seeing a movie or playing a game is good for dissolving an identity crisis.

Now I understand that life today is complicated and with most families having both parents work, it is not always easy to find time for your family let alone yourself, but you have to. I also understand that with today’s economy money is tight, but a lot of these things are not that expensive, and your family is worth the expense and so are us guys. However it is important that you and your family don’t forget who you are.

That’s all I have for you folks today here at Parents R Us. I hope it has been helpful especially to all of you husbands, dads, and boyfriends out there who are in that wonderful club called PARENTS. Until the next time we get together I hope you all have a wonderful weekend and an awesome week to follow, CIAO4NOW!!!!!

After a weekend full of harried back-to-school shopping, looking for notebooks, the perfect pair of shoes, and school clothes to please kids (a feat in itself), the day has finally arrived - the first day of school. *Cough* dollars later, the kids were off to school this morning without a hitch, and I found myself fighting back a few tears…I just can't believe…it's free childcare. Lol.

The first few hours of freedom have been spent working, and I forgot how much I can accomplish when the kids are in school. It's incredible. It takes a 10 hour work day down to about six hours. Amazing what you can get done when you're not running around fixing snacks every 30 minutes, answering questions like "how do you spell dinosaur" (had to throw that one in again) and picking out new Barney shows for the kids.

Here are just a few things that come to mind when I think back-to-school. (Feel free to throw in an "Amen" here and there).

- For a few hours each day the house will be quiet
- I'll finally be able to go to the bathroom by myself
- The house will stay clean more than 5 minutes
- The food bill will decrease by half
- I can actually have "alone" time with my husband
- The ability to go somewhere on my own
- Showering without having to chase the kids out of the room
- I get a break from Barney from 8am-3pm
- Listening to or watching what I want (instead of Barney, Wiggles, or my daughter on the phone…)

Of course, school time does bring about new challenges for kids and their parents, and I'm sure we'll discuss some of them along the way here at Parents R Us. However, just for today, it's time to celebrate…the kids are back in school! Have anything to add? Feel free to share as always!

Hi there, and thanks for taking time to visit Parents R Us. Today my post is especially directed towards the moms, although I know you dads will definitely get some insight from this post too, so don't bail out thinking this is only for women. After all, some of this can apply to men too.

Today I want to talk to moms about losing your identity in motherhood. Perhaps you have heard of this or it may have never crossed your mind. Whatever the case, this is a problem that many moms deal with and I really think it needs to be addressed.

Now admittedly, I'm not a conventional mom. I didn't get nine months to prepare for my kids - I became "insta-mom" lol. However, I know that I have found that it is very easy to become a mom and become totally immersed in motherhood (whether you give birth to children, adopt them, or get them by marriage).

Becoming immersed in motherhood is not a bad thing. It's great that you love your children - you should! The problem arises when you begin to lose your identity. If you have kids, you know what I mean. One day you look in the mirror and wonder who that is, or perhaps you find yourself in the grocery store suddenly forgetting how to communicate with people over the age of 5.

Women who work at home or stay at home with the children are often more likely to experience the loss of their own identity. When you are the "caretaker" for your children, sometimes those maternal instincts can directly conflict with having an identity of your own. The thing is, if you want to be the best mom, you have to maintain a strong sense of self.

You need to remember that you are a person, other than just a mom. You have dreams, hopes, likes, dislikes, wants, and needs - just like anyone else. Start pushing these things into the background all the time, and you are going to suffer from burnout, or "losing yourself." Yes, burnout can happen to moms. Simply look at the depression statistics among women who have children - they are staggering! This depression can occur postpartum or at other stages of motherhood. Many times the reasons moms go through depression (and some even suffer from nervous breakdowns) is because they have lost a sense of self, or a sense of their own identity.

You may be thinking, "this could never happen to me." You're wrong! If you don't take time now to maintain your own identity, you can deal with these problems, and at times they can become quite severe. The key is to recognize the problem before it becomes severe and work to make sure you keep your own identity. How can you do this? Here are some suggestions:

- Avoid being a mom that is too possessive. When you are overly possessive of your children, you give away your personal power to your children.

- Don't try to please your kids all the time. Not only will you wear yourself out, but you'll lose their respect, and you'll stop respecting yourself.

- Remember your own needs. Listen to them. It's not selfish to remember your own needs - it's simply honest and can help you maintain your own identity.

- When your kids make mistakes, remember it doesn't reflect on you. Too many moms feel like failures when kids make mistakes. You are doing fine as long as you are letting your kids learn through experiences of their own so they eventually become self directed.

- Have a life other than the kids. I know, it sounds impossible. However, you need to have a life that includes friends, your family, and activities you enjoy.

- Eliminate words like "guilty" and "selfish" from your dictionary. When you use these words on yourself, they destroy your confidence and diminish your true worth.

- Come to the realization that your kids don't ALWAYS need you for every little thing. There are quite a few things they can do on their own - you just have to let them.

- Get your spouse involved. If you are a single parent, then recruit the help of friends and family. You shouldn't have to do this alone.

- Last of all, stop thinking you have to be a perfect mom. Parenting is like an art that you are always working on. When you think you have to be perfect, this puts an unnecessary burden on you.

If you have forgot who you are, if you look in the mirror and don't recognize the face, or you just no longer even know who lives inside your body, it's time to do something about it. Don't lose your identity. If you do lose your identity, you can't be the mom you need to be. Moms who know who they are, who maintain their identity, and who ensure their emotional needs are met, are able to give even more to their children. So, it's not selfish, it is in your best interest and in the best interest of your family too.

I know this post is a bit long, but I have felt it is an important topic. Many moms have "crashed and burned" because of this problem. Hopefully this will be helpful to other moms out there. If you have any comments or advice to add, feel free to leave a comment. We always love to hear what you have to say!

If you are a parent, more than likely you have heard of Harry Potter, both the books and movies, at some point in time. The books are some of the best selling books out there and the movies have broken many records. However, there seem to be questions in the minds of many parents as to whether or not these books and movies are family friendly, and that's what I want to talk about today here at Parents R Us.

There are many churches out there today that feel that Harry Potter is wicked and evil. Then on the other side, there are many people who look at these books and movies as pure, harmless entertainment. As a parent though, you may be wondering whether or not Harry Potter is really suitable for your children…and it's definitely something important to think about. After all, it is important that you are careful about what your kids are watching.

I know that in our house, we usually don't let our kids read or see things that we haven't seen or at least done some research into. Unfortunately we made a mistake in this area recently, watching a movie we couldn't really remember too well, and when it was all over, my husband and I wished we would have been a bit more careful before showing that particular movie to the kids, although the movie did make a great point.

The reason I even brought up this Harry Potter subject is because we took the family to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, which happens to be the sixth movie in the series.

Personally, in the past I had heard a lot of bad about Harry Potter. Many people I know proclaimed this book series as evil. However, after I got married, my step children were already into Harry Potter, so I decided to give the movies a look myself. Honestly, I have never found any evil or corruption in these books and movies.

There are some people who seem to have the idea that since there is magic, wizards, and more in these books, they are evil books. Well let me point you to The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. Look at all the magic and strange creatures that appear in these books, yet most parents find them just fine for their kids. I really don't see much of a different between these two series of books.

From my experience, I would say that what the Harry Potter books and movies really portray is the age old struggle between good and evil. In fact, I have found that in many ways they are almost allegorical, portraying Christian events through secular literature, something that C.S. Lewis lauded as very effective. Yes, children do see evil, they see magic, and more in these movies, but they see the triumph of good over evil, and what a struggle this really is.

Of course, showing these movies to your kids or allowing them to read the books is a personal choice. However, I do believe as a parent that Harry Potter can be a great tool for you to teach your child more about good vs. evil, faith, and more. It opens the door in an entertaining way for you to teach your children more about your own belief system, which is important.

So this is my opinion on the Harry Potter controversy. I think that these books and movies can be used to help teach your kids important lessons, but you do need to make sure that you consider your own personal values and ideas and make a decision that you feel comfortable with for you and your children.

What do you think about Harry Potter? Let us know. We'd love to hear what you have to say about this and even some of the other literature out there for kids today here at Parents R Us.

P.S. In my research I've found some interesting articles and papers on Christian values that come up in the Harry Potter books and movies. Here is the link to an article on Harry Potter and the Bible, which I found very interesting. You may want to check it out.

What is a parent? That is a very good question I think, and one that is addressed in both serious and comedic fashion on a regular basis here at Parents R Us. Both Joy and I have covered the topic of parenting from many different angles since we started this blog, but today with Joys blessing I am just going to cover the question what is a parent.

I think a parent is a person who always considers the needs of a child or children first before giving themselves any consideration. This does not mean that all decisions will ultimately be in the best interest of the child/children, just that they are the first consideration. Lets face it there will unfortunately always come a time when as a parent you will have to compromise.

Joy and I both personally know people who have had to make these considerations and serious decisions. Some of these people we know have very inspiring stories and in some cases we even consider these stories heroic. An amazing thing is that most of these people would not even think of themselves as heroes, but at least to their children they are.

Joy has a very good friend who lost her husband and father to her two children in a gun fight in Pennsylvania not to long ago, and he was a law enforcement officer. Yet with this woman and her children’s lives crumbling all around her she kept her wits about her and made the hard decisions for her children that kept them all on the right track. This woman is a parent.

I have a very good friend of mine who has spent a lot of time and money to get custody of all of her sisters children because her sister is addicted to drugs. This friend of mine just recently got custody of the last and youngest of her sister’s kids who also happens to be bi-racial. Her only consideration was these children who are her family. This person is what I call a parent.

A parent is also any person who gets up every day and makes those decisions involving the care, feeding, clothing, health, and education of their kids even when these decisions are not always the easiest. Lets face it people but in these tough and hard economic times these decisions are becoming even more and more harder to make as the budget shrinks and employment opportunities are disappearing at an alarming rate.

These parents may even include unwed teen mothers who know they are not fit to care for a child, but choose adoption over abortion. These parents are also single people as well as married couples who want to adopt for whatever reason but will love them fiercely. In the case of my cousin they may even be a gay couple who have adopted a child and love them unconditionally just as if the child were one of their own.

I guess that at the end of all of this bloviating of mine about what a parent is, I have come to the conclusion that a parent is a person who just loves their children to the extreme. A parent only want what is best for their children, and will never quit or give up the good fight to make their children’s lives and world a better place for them to grow up in.

Well that is about all I have to say for now other that to quote a lady I heard recently. “Some people have the idea that a baby isn’t wanted, but a baby is ALWAYS wanted…maybe not by you but by someone”. So remember that adoption is always a woman’s choice too. To all of you parents out there you are the hero’s. Have a great day my friends and CIAO4NOW!!!!!

When I was a kid, I would have never even dreamed of having a phone of my own, much less a cell phone. I mean, seriously, I'm only 29 and I remember when cell phones were brick size. I didn't even have phone privileges at all when I was a kid. However, it seems that today things are a lot different and just about everyone has a cell phone, including kids.

Our teenage daughter has a cell phone, and it hasn’t come without some ground rules. I don't necessarily have a problem with kids and teens having cell phones, but I do believe that there must be some rules surrounding kids and cell phones for their safety and our sanity.

After all, you only need do a bit of research and you'll find quite a few horror stories surrounding cell phones. Not only are sexual predators on the internet these days, but they are stalking kids on their cell phones as well. There is also the problem of "sexting" going on, where kids use cell phones to text sexual messages and pictures to each other.

Just recently I was talking to someone, who will remain anonymous. She was having problems with her son and took his cell phone away from him. When she took the phone, she was horrified to find all kinds of porn pictures on the phone as well as many sexual text messages. This kid was only 15 years old and was already into all kinds or hardcore porn. This is one danger of cell phones, and parents you must watch out for this if you kids have a cell phone. Kids can send it to each other or if they have internet on their phones, they can easily find porn for cell phones too.

Not only is their the danger of predators and porn and "sexting," but there is also the danger of a humongous bill. Recently I read in the news about a teenager that ran up a bill over $4,000 in a month's time. This is not the norm, but I know a teen myself that ran up a bill over $1000. Once you go over your minutes or text messages, those charges add up quickly, not to mention the costs of downloading games, ringtones, and backgrounds for phones.

Due to the dangers that are out there when it comes to cell phones, in our family we have some basic ground rules regarding the cell phone. Here is a look at some of the rules we use that you may want to consider for you teen as well.

- Rule #1 - The phone is not used after 10pm. Unless there is special permission for an extra 5-10 minutes, which happens very rarely, the phone is not in use after this time. There is no way we are going to let our kids stay up all night texting or playing on their phone.

- Rule #2 - Cell phones are not answered during dinner. In fact, they are not even allowed at the dinner table. Not only is this a rule for our kids, but it is a rule we keep as well. Unless we are expected an important call, we don't answer our phones during dinner. That is family time, we are eating, and whoever is calling can wait. We try to lead by example here.

- Rule #3 - The cell phone is not used in the office while my husband and I are working. My husband and I both work at home. The home office is where we work, and it is difficult to work with a teen jabbering away on the phone the entire time we are trying to work. So when we are working, the cell phone is not used in the office area. Unless it is business related, my husband and I generally don't take calls in the office either. We move to another room to avoid disturbing each other.

- Rule #4 - The privilege of a cell phone is performance based. My husband and I believe that the cell phone is a privilege, not a right in this house. This means that if our kids don't take care of their responsibilities, they may lose their cell phone. (This also applies to computer use) If our kids don’t take care of their chores or their homework, during the school year, then the cell phone goes "bye-bye" until they improve on taking care of their responsibilities.

- Rule #5 - Cell phones don't get used during school, unless there is an emergency. Most schools don't allow cell phones to be out during class anyway. If the teacher takes our kids phones, then we don't feel the need to go get the phone back right away.

- Rule #6 - We, meaning my husband and I, don't take a backseat to the cell phone. This means that when our kids are told to do something, we don't wait for them to get off the phone. We don't wait on dinner because of the cell phone either. In our family we believe that family is the most important thing, and family doesn't fall in second place to a cell phone.

These are just a few of the rules that we use when it comes to our teens and the use of cell phones. I believe cell phones can be a great tool to have. They are very useful for when you have kids involved in after school activities so they can call you. I have also found that they are useful in many other ways. As long as there are rules that guide them, they can be a great tool.

Thanks for checking out Parents R Us again. Do you have kids with cell phones? Share your comments, rules, or stories with us. We'd love to hear what you think about kids and cell phones.

Welcome to Parents R Us. Hope your summer is going well and that you are surviving it.

When you are a parent, there are just some things that you hear that make you cringe or want to go hide. I know that every time I hear certain words come out of my kids' mouths I know we are in trouble. Lol. Here is a list of a few things you never want to hear your kids say. Yes, some of them are truly scary…

- "Mom, would you still love me if my room was on fire?"

- "Happy Mother's Day. I bedazzled your Dolce bag for you Mom."

- "It's okay to put tinfoil in the microwave, right?"

- "Doesn't Spike (the dog) look good in Armani?"

- "You didn't say I couldn't…"

- (When brushing your teeth) "Oops, I forgot to tell you I dropped your toothbrush in the toilet yesterday mom."

- "Uh Oh"

- "Come see what I did Mom"

- "Mom, remember that formerly in mint condition car…"

- "But I made it myself…"

Feel free to add some of your own in the comments. I'd love to hear what your kids say that makes you laugh or scares the life out of you. Lol.

I like to think that as parents the better half and I are fairly easy going in that department. We make sure that both of our teenagers have everything they need and most of what they want too. As far as our kids go they a pretty well behaved and they seem to love us as much as we love them. Both of our kids also have their own sets of responsibilities in and around the house that they are required to complete if they want their allowances and other privileges too.

However at what point do we have to draw the line when it appears that they are not living up to their responsibilities, which I might add are not as tough or stringent as in other families. We really feel that throughout the course of the day as well as for the week that they do not have to do all that much in order to keep their privileges and toys. Yet every now and then they seem to want to see how much they can get away with and the second they get called on it, they act like their life has ended and that we are picking on them.

I’m not going to tell you that I was a well behaved teenager, because the truth is I may not have been the devil back then, but I was one of his own, or so my mother tells me, LOL. However my wife, who for the record has had her moments as a teen, was an academic in highschool and college, as well as the proverbial preachers daughter, and fairly conservative as a teen. As a result of our differences in our upbringings we have come to realize that there has to be rules and punishment when they are broken.

Now before you all jump to conclusions I am not talking about physical punishment at all. Besides both of our kids are to old for a spanking at this stage in their lives, although for the record as a father I never believed in sparing the rod to spoil the child. I punish them by taking away their computer, phone, TV, allowance and sometimes even their social obligations to friends.

I’m here to tell you when they lose any of those you will get their attention too. When my kids want those things back they break land speed records in the performance of their familial obligations. Don’t get me wrong they will moan and complain the whole time they are taking care of business, but they get it all done in record time. Somehow I don’t think that this makes us bad parents either, so let us know what you think.

That’s all today for this installment of Parents “R” Us, but I guarantee you will be hearing from us again soon. Have a terrific day and CIAO4NOW!!!!!

Ahhh summer break. It's the thing every kid looks forward to all year long and every parent dreads all year long. Even I used to look forward to it when I was a kid. Lol. Summer break is in full swing now, and more than likely you are dealing with some changes in your life now that the kids are at home 24/7. This is today's topic for Parents R Us.

As a parent, I don't believe I ever fully understood the phrase in the Christmas song, "Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again." I do now! I've experienced this on school breaks, and summer is even longer.

Personally, I always find it difficult to adapt to a new schedule. I get a good schedule going, I get into it, and I like it that way. While the kids were in school this year, my husband and I adapted to our own schedule. We both work at home and we had a great schedule, work during the day, a little more work in the evening, relax for a couple hours, then go to bed. Then the whole schedule was changed when the kids got out of school.

It's getting better, but I do have to admit I'm still trying to adjust. I wake up and my home office is already invaded by kids. There are about 500 questions asked each day. I'm trying to work and some random question is asked in the middle of my work, like "How do you spell dinosaur?" There went my train of thought and I'm now preoccupied with the idea that my 8th grader going into 9th grade is asking me how to spell "dinosaur." What are they teaching kids in school anyway??? My reply..."Google it."

They always seem to want something else to eat too. I mean seriously…how much can two kids eat? I can't even sneak to my office with a small lunch without it being "eyed' by the kids. Then I just end up fixing some for everyone. An hour later I'm finally back to work again. Lol.

Just about the time I get in a good working groove, there is some kiddie related interruption. "Mom, the cable is acting funny." "Can you buy more ice cream?" "Will you help me fix my hair?" "When will the laundry be done?" The questions go on and on.

Plus there is the fact that time alone with my husband is practically non-existent unless we stay up really late at night. Even then, there seems to be a kid that decides to wander the house just at the moment things seem to "heat up" (if ya know what I mean). By now a lock on the outside of their bedroom door is beginning to sound REAL good.

If you are a parent trying to work at home, or even if you work out of the home, you no doubt know how different the summer can be. All you can do is hang on, work to preserve your sanity, and pray that school (free daycare) starts again soon. Of course by the time the end of the summer comes, you'll be adapted to the summer schedule, and once again you'll be back to getting into a new schedule. Ahhh, the changes never end when you have kids…

So what are you experiencing with the kids home this summer? Share your laughs, your frustrations, and even your tears with us. We're here to listen and enjoy hearing from other parents. Check back soon and you'll find some great tips on how to keep the kids busy during the summer. Thanks for checking out Parents R Us. Until next time, God Bless. You need every blessing you can get. :-)

I have to tell you that Joy’s last post on Parents “R” Us was very funny as well as insightful. However I feel that there was one aspect of vacationing or just getting away for a day or two that I need to address. What I am talking about is not only quality time with your whole family, but with your significant other as well.

Let’s face it when you have a family and you go out of town for a little change of scenery or a full blown vacation, it is a safe bet that everyone is going along including the family pet if you have one. The problem with that is chances are dad and mom need some of that time away for themselves. Of course you can rule the daytime hours out because that’s when the whole family is together.

Unfortunately that just leaves the hours between when the kids crash out and then wake up, and on vacation the normal bedtime curfew is almost impossible to enforce. Still as adults you have to find a way to maximize the benefits of that time to your advantage. There are some pretty simple ways to do that for your parental selves too. All you have to do is be a little creative and maybe a little sneaky too.

Guys you can do things for your woman like making sure that the hotel accommodation you booked, is a suite with a bedroom for the two of you. Having a late night candle light room service delivered for the two of you. A little wine or champagne on the balcony is nice and add strawberries, because they enhance the flavor of the wine and bubbly. Make sure that you let her know she is attractive to you and desired, then prove it intimately.

Lady’s the things you can do for your guy are simple. Since you spend most of your time playing taxi, cleaning the house, doing the shopping, and even working in most cases you don’t get to dress sexy enough so here is your chance. Let your fella know that he is loved, desired, appreciated, and very special to you too. There is nothing better for creating a harmonious relationship than intimacy between the two of you.

Remember if the two of you are not happy then there is a very good chance that no one in your immediate family is going to be happy. One of the reasons for going away is to de-stress and decompress. Another is doing the same old thing day in and day out. Just remember that it is not the only the kids that get to have fun, but you need to play once in a while to.

However if you are just going out of town for a day or two and grandma or whoever you trust will watch the kids for that time, then ignore all of the family related comments in this blog. At that point go out and be big kids during your escape, but remember that consenting adult playtime is also a necessity to take advantage of as well.

That’s it for this post but I will be back again soon. Have an awesome day and CIAO4NOW!!!!!

Welcome to Parents R Us. It's been a bit since we've been around, and vacation has been part of the reason, which happens to be my topic for today's post.

If you have kids of your own, you probably already know that a well planned vacation can turn into quite an experience. Of course the big thing that I learned on our past vacation was that even when things don't go as planned, incredible memories are often born through those trying times.

This past weekend we took off on a Friday for the mountains, hoping to escape the hot 100+ degree temperatures, as well as work, for a bit. We planned our trip up to Sedona and Flagstaff, Arizona. Our first mistake was booking a room in Flagstaff, which is about 25 miles away from Sedona. The reason we decided to make this choice is because we found a great deal on a great "sounding" suite. The prices were a bit cheaper than down in Sedona, our target goal, so we decided to make the reservation.

After a stressful work week trying to cram all of our work into a few days, we finally took off Friday afternoon. Of course we should have made that trip earlier, since we spend a good bit of time in traffic, which often occurs on the weekend with many hot people from the greater Phoenix area heading towards cooler temperatures for the weekend.

The drive was beautiful. There were mountains all around, beautiful vistas to behold, and we were all set for a weekend of relaxation and fun. That is until we reached Flagstaff. We pulled into the hotel about 5pm, ready to unload, relax, find dinner, and really start relaxing. Well, that wasn't to be…

When we first arrived, the hotel was definitely much different than the pictures on the website. (It was actually one of the Choice Hotels group, which I've always had good experience with in the past). I wasn't very impressed, but walked in, figuring that perhaps the outer appearance would be deceiving…and I've never been SO wrong.

After paying for the room (who knew I had to pay beforehand, when did they start that) we went to unload in our room. As we walked through the door we were greeted by a cold wind. There on the floor lay the window, shattered in a million pieces on the floor. Now it may have been 100+ in Phoenix, but up in Flagstaff it was supposed to be in the 30's that night, so the wind was really cold. I couldn't believe that the window was on the floor, and to make matters worse, our 2-bedroom suite with living room turned out to be a ratty living room with another room crammed with 2 beds.

Talk about a bad beginning to a vacation. I immediately called the front desk as we surveyed the room. The carpet had holes, the entire room smelled horrid, the microwave had a huge dent in it, and then there was the window shattered all over the floor. I quickly decided that maybe working sounded pretty good compared to this disaster.

So, by the time the manager arrived, we weren't so sure we wanted to stay, even after they fixed the window. All I could think about is one of the kids getting cut on some leftover sliver of glass, not to mention the room was still so cold I was sitting there shivering.

It was now 6pm and we had to start looking for other accommodations. There I am on my computer looking for some other option. Our whole plan had been around the suite, with a room to give my husband and me a bit of privacy for a weekend to enjoy some romantic time together. There was nothing available in Flagstaff, and so I looked in Sedona, but everything was horribly expensive and no suites were available. Finally my husband called an old favorite of ours in Sedona, and we were amazingly able to get a room if we could get there in 90 minutes. The room was a room with only 2 queen beds, but we didn't have many options, so we took it. We knew it was clean, warm, and had a balcony with a great view.

So, we all loaded all the luggage back in the car, went to get our money back (which still hasn't been put back on my credit card I may add) and all piled into the car to take off to try and make it to the hotel in time.

Frustrated, feeling horrible, and thinking that this may have been a disastrous start to our vacation, we went on our way. However, as we drove, we were treated to a lovely sunset and incredible scenery as we traveled through the canyon and down to Sedona. I was reminded that often it is those detours in life that provide us with the most amazing views and scenery.

Finally we arrived at our destination, once again unloaded all the luggage, and then we had to find food. The hour was late, and places were closing, so we drove around for about 40 minutes trying to find a good place to eat that wouldn't cost $50 per person. Lol. We finally found the Red Planet Diner, an alien themed restaurant, not our first choice, but when you are that hungry, the décor doesn't matter anymore. We then scarfed down food like we had never seen it before.

The rest of the weekend was incredible. Even in our cramped quarters we enjoyed a great time as a family. We explored the red rocks, took pictures, and even spend some time in the Chapel of the Holy Cross, a beautiful little Catholic chapel right on the red rocks. It was incredible. There were the moments we spent time sitting on our balcony in the moonlight, enjoying time together, and even though the vacation had a bad start, it was a special time as a family. It wasn't the romantic time we had planned, but we all definitely grew closer as we dealt with everything as a family.

Of course one more thing that we learned on our trip home was never listen to women at antique consignment shops when it comes to directions. We were trying to take a new and scenic way home. We were given directions by a lady at "Three Sisters" consignment shop, an antique shop along the road we found. It took us the wrong way, which we finally figured out, so we stopped and asked a cop.

The cops directions weren't that much better. We were looking for a bathroom and a place to eat. I'd already been frantic to use the bathroom for more than an hour, but he said there was everything we'd need just a few miles up the road. Now that was a joke. We went through a portion of this town, but there were not restaurants to stop in. We kept going, thinking there must be something ahead. Then we found ourselves in the mountains. Nothing to see but mountains all around. The road was crazy, with switchbacks every couple of minutes, and by this time three of us were desperate to find a bathroom.

We kept getting excited when we would see a sign for a town ahead. Then the town would consist only of 3-4 houses, a small church, and a biker bar. Not willing to brave the bar, we kept going. The mountains seemed like they would never end. In fact, there weren't even any houses around most of the time, much less a gas station where we could find relief for our aching bladders. Finally in Peeples Valley, we found a lonely gas station. We practically ran through the door, as locals sitting around watched with curiosity. Finally we all had our bathroom break - 40 miles after where we should have. I truthfully had begun to think that there was never an end to these mountains.

We all got a little crazy, but thankfully we didn't have to find a cactus to hide behind to relieve ourselves. Lol. We all will remember Peeples Valley as long as we live. The wonderful people with the little gas station that had bathrooms.

So, note to self for the future:

- Don't ever book in Flagstaff again
- If the rates sound too good to be true…there's probably a broken window
- Never listen to a lady that runs a consignment antique shop when you need directions
- Population 5 people doesn't equal a town
- The best memories often come from the most frustrating times.

Ever had those times when you just want to laugh at your kids? Sure, there are always times when you feel like smoke is coming out of your ears you are so mad, but then there are the times you want to laugh. You should be scolding them and letting them know that their behavior is inappropriate, yet you can barely hold back that snicker that is bubbling up.

Maybe you don't have these moments when you want to laugh hysterically, but I sure do. Sometimes when I probably should be giving some long, boring, drawn out lecture I find myself barely able to control my laughter. Let me give you an example.

In order to keep my son from destroying an entire bag of Doritos (one of his favorite snacks) all in one setting, we have made a rule that chips are put in a bowl, not eaten out of the bag. Then we hide the rest of the chips. LOL.

Well, one day my husband and I were quite sick, and our son was fending for himself. He decided to have some Doritos (don't ask me how he ever was able to reach them in the cupboard above the stove…I cringe to think of it). I staggered out of the bedroom to check on him, and there he sat watching his favorite show eating Doritos out of a bowl.

I was so proud of him. He ate a serving out of a bowl (I thought) and I complimented him on following the rules. On to the kitchen I went. The sight that met me was hilarious. There on the counter sat an almost empty family size bag of Doritos. Surrounding it was six bowls. They all had Doritos crumbs in them. He didn't eat out of the bag…he just had a different bowl for each serving.

I started laughing hysterically. How could I scold him? After all, I had already complimented him on using a bowl. I just had to laugh.

I could tell you story after story where I wanted to laugh at something my kids have done. I don't have time to tell you all of them. Sometimes I have to admit to them that something really is funny. Of course then I tell them why it may not have been a good choice.

Let me know about some of your stories. I'd love to hear about the ways your kids make you laugh! Thanks for checking out Parents R Us again!

Welcome back to Parents R Us. Today I want to talk about an important topic - Mothers. As you all probably know, this past Sunday was Mother's Day. This is a special day that is set aside to honor and appreciate moms and it's been celebrated for quite a few years now. This history of this day is rich, and I don't have the time to get into all of the history today, but the goal of this day, no matter the name, has always been the same - to take the time out to thank moms for all they do.

I have to tell you that as a mom I really enjoy Mother's Day. I've spent many years spending Mother's Day thanking my own mother, and of course I still do that, but for the past two years I have been on the other end of Mother's Day as well - the mother. I've only been a mom for almost two years now, and my Mother's Day was very special. I spent the day with those that mean the most to me and was showered with love and some wonderful gifts.

More than ever before I actually do realize how amazing moms are. I really don't think any of us women end up properly appreciating our mothers until we become a mom ourselves. Somehow things are seen very differently when you have "walked a mile in their shoes." There are days that you wonder how your mom ever did all she did and wonder how you are going to accomplish everything you need to do. This thought brings me to the main topic I want to talk about…going beyond Mother's Day.

It's pretty easy for us to just remember moms on one day. We send cards, shower mom with gifts, send flowers, and it's one of the big shopping seasons of the year. Just walk into Wal-Mart the day before Mother's Day and you'll see the card isle crammed with people vying for those last few cards and frantic men searching frantically through the store for a gift for their wives.

The thing is, moms need to be appreciated all year long. Don't just take one day to remember all your mom has done for you and to thank her. You can do this any day. Sure, Mother's Day is a special day, but don't go through the rest of the year taking your mom for granted. It's easy to just take everything that mom does for granted. I know I have been guilty of that myself. We should never forget all that moms have done. Moms are amazing. In fact, I really do believe that many moms are "super" moms.

So, while you definitely want to make Mother's Day special, make sure you take time to thank mom all year long for what she does. You mother is amazing. No matter her faults, no matter the mistakes she has made, just say thank you and don't ever take her for granted. And…if you are a mom, pat yourself on the back - you deserve it!

Welcome back to Parents R Us! Today I want to talk to you about something that I feel is important, and something that many families have forgotten - family time.

Today we all lead busy lives. Think about your own life. How many things do you have to do every day? Sure, you do all the important things for your kids. You feed them, clothe them, put a roof over their head, but how much time are you spending with them?

It's easy in a hectic world, especially as your children get older, to have that family time together. However, building those family ties is important. Family is forever!

Here in our house, we have a special family night about once a week. Now I can't say that there haven't been times when the situation called for family night to be put off, such as when sickness hits, but we do our best to make this a weekly routine.

The choice of activity varies. Often we spend time watching a good family movie. In fact, last week we watched "Bedtime Stories" together, which ended up being a pretty cool movie for the family. There are other times where we play games, or sometimes we invite over extended family for a nice dinner and chat.

With parents and kids going a million different ways these days, too many times families forget to spend time together. Then as kids grow up, parents suddenly wonder why their kids basically shut them out of their lives. It's because those family bonds were not tightly build during time together.

Years ago before computers and cell phones, families spent more time together. They enjoyed each other's company. Now families text each other or leave an IM. While new technology is great, there is nothing that will ever take the place of quality time with your kids.

Take the time out to spend time together as a family. We've forgotten today how important family really is. Spending time together can help. No matter what you do, try to spend one night a week having special time together. You'll never regret it.

Hello everybody and welcome back to another installment of the immensely popular and hip blog Parents “R” Us. Today we are going to discuss parental rights and the political effort to remove these rights from you and to put the power in your children’s hands. I had blogged about this on my political blog Simple Man Politics, but I felt it necessary to bring it to this forum as well.

As parents we can’t let our rights to raise our children be stripped away from us. We raise our children with the morals, values, and beliefs that we were raised with or feel are very important to living a healthy life physically, emotionally, and morally. We also reserve the right to punish our children for their transgressions in an appropriate measure, or reward them for their accomplishments as well.

Parental rights and children’s rights have been hotly contested issues in recent years due to the rise of socially relaxed morals and values as evidenced by our current government and its policies. Now there is a new player in the game of parental/children’s rights and that is the United Nations and boy do they have it in for us parents.

The UN has this thing called the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child. This piece of international language that they want to pass of as a treaty was ratified by the UN General Assembly on November 20, 1989 and entered into force in accordance with UN article 49 on September 2, 1990. What they want to United States to sign this treaty thereby giving the UN legal authority to enforce its rules against US citizens.

In a nutshell what this document says is that we as parents no longer have the right to punish our children. This document would also make spanking your child a criminal offense of assault. This document goes even further than that though it also implies that as a parent you have no right to know if your child is pregnant or o prevent an abortion. Basically this treaty puts the power in your child’s hands, but what does a child know about making responsible decisions.

There is however an organization out there with the information you need to know more details about this UN treaty as well as how to fight against its passage. The organization is parentalrights.org and its founder is a man by the name of Michael Farris. Michael Farris believes in protecting children by empowering parents, and it is from him that I first heard of this UN document.

That is all I have for you guys today, but look at the UN treaty and at parentalrights.org and you can see for yourself. I hope you all have an awesome day and a super weekend and we will be back again next week CIAO4NOW!!!!!

As you all know this blog titled Parents “R” Us is all about the experiences, insights, advice, and little things that people who are not parents probably wouldn’t understand. This blog is also for any parent married or single to read, so that they will realize that they are not alone out there, and someone definitely understands the insanity that is called family. So today I am going to talk about my favorite subject my own insanity, lol.

I have to tell ya I love being a dad or Poppi as my kids call me. I also love my wife to pieces and I am grateful every single day that she has accepted my kids as her own and that my kids have adopted her as one of their own and I am grateful for their acceptance as well as hers.

The two kids ages 16 and 15 respectively I am talking about are from a previous relationship that went on and off for approximately 19 years and ended very badly for their mother. We meaning the kids and I are lucky that my wife was there to help pick up the pieces, because there is no telling where we might have wound up without her love or support.

It is really amazing that my wife would choose to become a mom to kids already in their teens, but she is equal to the task. It is equally amazing that someone as young and beautiful as she is would choose to wed a man of my age. I am 45 years old and she is 28 years old a difference of 17 years.

The greatest lesson I have learned from this experience is that age doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that my wife is only 12 years older than my son, or that my daughter is only 13 years younger than my wife. The 17 years difference in age doesn’t matter between the two of us either. What does matter is that the fountain of love is bottomless and that love itself is ageless.

If you are a single parent you should pay special attention to this. If you are interested in someone and you are older or younger than they are, or your kids are closer in age to that person than you are, it doesn’t matter unless the both of you or all of you make age an impassable barrier. If you are a married couple with a great difference in age then you already know or should know what I am saying.

The keys to making any relationship work is love, trust, and respect for the boundaries that your family must live within. This is very important for maintaining the integrity of the family unit and will result in the mutual respect of every member of the family for the other members of the family.

Father and Mother must always be united, never divided in order to maintain their authority so the kids know that the answers will always be the same no matter who they ask. Parents must always respect the individuality of their children, never treat one with more difference than the other, and never love one of them less than the other.

One piece of advice for the husbands out there though, Mothers Day is coming up and she deserves something nice for all that she does for you guys so make sure it either smells pretty, shines nicely, looks sexy, tastes sinfully delicious, or all of the above and you guys know what I mean.

That is all I have to talk about for today, but I am sure I will have something else to talk about very soon. Have an awesome day my friends and CIAO4NOW!!!!!

Parenting. It's not as easy as it looks. Yep, it all looks easy until you do it. Then you find out the truth. This is a task that nothing will prepare you for. If you're a parent, I know you can identify.

There are times that being a parent makes you want to pull your hair out. Some days it's frustrating, other days your kids make you mad, sometimes you aren't sure where to turn. But…then there are the little moments that come along that make parenting so worth it.

It's the little moments, like when you get the big hugs and kisses at the end of the day that make you feel everything is worth while.

It's the laughter of the kids you hear through the house that makes you smile and know you must be doing something right.

It's the angelic look on their faces as they sleep at night that remind you what huge gifts from God kids really are.

It's the note from a child or a colored picture they give you that brings tears to your eyes.

It's the "I love you's" they say that make your heart sing.

It's those precious dinner time conversations that make you laugh hysterically because no one else would have a clue what your family was talking about.

It's those comedic moments you miss on camera that stick in your mind forever and have you laughing for days.

These are the little moments that keep a parent going. It's easy to forget about your child killing the cell phone or blowing up the microwave in these little moments. The fact that they once again forgot to take out the recyclables slips your mind in these moments.

These are the moments I live for. They make my heart sing. They are fertilizer to a growing parent. They are the perfect memories that live forever in my heart.

Thanks for visiting Parents R Us once again. I hope you take a bit of time out today to think about some of your own little memories with your children that make parenting a joy.

One of the things that all families have to deal with is illness in the home. This is especially true where your children are concerned, because they bring home the majority of all the illnesses you will eventually suffer. You know what they say, “The Family That Shares Together Stays Together” LOL.

As you know kids will share everything too. They will share their dirty clothes with their bedroom floors, the foods they don’t like with the family pet, so why not share their colds, flu’s, and fevers with their parents. After all isn’t sharing caring?

There are a few things that you can do to combat potential illness on the home front though, and they are really quite simple things to do, so let’s run down a short list okay?

1) Make sure your kids always wash up before going to school.
2) Make sure your kids are dressed appropriately for the weather when they go out.
3) Make sure you and your kids always wash up before eating.
4) Make sure your kids bathe or shower at least once a day.
5) Make sure your kids brush their teeth at least twice a day.
6) Make sure your kids eat balanced and nutritional meals.
7) Make sure your kids keep a regular schedule from the time they wake up till the time they go to sleep.

Here is a short list of some necessary things you should keep in your home as well.

1) Make sure you have plenty of soap in the house, both bar style and anti-bacterial.
2) Make sure you have things like Aspirin, (Ibuprophen), and acetaminophen (Tylenol) in your home for those little aches and pains.
3) Make sure to have things like liquid Tylenol and Nyquil to battle sore throats, coughs, and congestion.
4) Make sure to have band aids for those cuts and scrapes so they don’t get infected.
5) Make sure to have a topical ointment type antibiotic like Neosporin to help fight infections from cuts and scrapes.
6) Make sure you have plenty of tissues in the house for runny noses.

If you can make your kids follow these simple rules and keep a good stock of the items listed then you should have a pretty good chance of fighting off the illnesses that will visit your home uninvited. I hope that this helps all of you out.

That is all for todays Parents "R" US post but we will be back again soon. Have a great day and CIAO4NOW!!!!!

I realize that the last Parents R Us blog was a bit sober, and today I'm planning to keep the tone a bit sober. I want to talk to you about a topic that has been heavy on my mind in the past few days. While you may find it a bit difficult to think about, it is something that every parent must think carefully about - preparing for the future.

Unfortunately, no one is guaranteed to be here tomorrow. It's a fact of life. Just because we are parents doesn't mean that we are immune to this. You may not always be around to take care of your children, and this is a fact that you must prepare for to ensure their needs are taken care of, even if something happens to you. Here is a look at some of the important steps to preparing for the future.

Talk to Your Spouse
It's not the most fun thing to talk about, but you need to sit down with your spouse and seriously talk about what will happen if something happens to one or both of you. You need to make sure that you are both on the same page. Find out your thoughts and try to come up with good decisions that will best take care of your children in the future.

Advance Directives and Power of Attorney
One thing that you may want to do is set up advance directives and medical power of attorney. If you both have end of life wishes, make sure you have an advance directive in place, also known as a living will. Medical power of attorney can be important. While usually spouses are automatically given this right, if something happens to both of you at the same time, it's a good idea to be prepared with someone you can trust to make these decisions. Don't just think about it. Get it in writing and ensure it's legal.

Child Custody
What will happen to your kids if something happens to you? If one of you has children from another relationship and you are living in a blended family, this is a decision that must be carefully made. If the children are yours, are you comfortable with them going back to your ex husband or wife? Maybe you want your current spouse to be the one to take care of your children if something happens to you. If so, make sure that everything is legally in place to ensure this happens, especially if you have an ex spouse that happens to abusive or dangerous. Consider child custody plans if something were to happen to both of you. If you are both gone, make sure you designate who will get your children so YOU are the one that makes that decision - not the state.

Write a Will
Writing a will can be important, especially if you have things you want to leave to your children. Many young couples don't have a will in place, which can lead to problems if something happens to them. You want to ensure that you say what happens to your money and other assets if something were to happen to you.

Get a Life Insurance Policy
While money can often be tight for parents raising a family, a life insurance policy is a need, not a want. What will happen to your family if you are suddenly taken from them? Will they be able to get by? You want to have the peace of mind knowing that they will be taken care of. A good life insurance policy can give you this peace of mind, and they don't have to be that expensive. This is especially important for those that are homeowners with large mortgages.

Thinking about these things is sobering; however, it is something that responsible parents must do. If you have not made these decisions, take some time to do so. You want to be there for your kids forever, but this is not always the case. Prepare for the future and remember - you are doing this for your kids!

Welcome to another installment of Parents “R” US. We are sorry that there has been a lapse in postings here, but sometimes life happens, and sometime life happens in a very BIG way. Joy as you know is the creator of Parents “R” us, and I am privileged to be able to write along side of her here.

However I am writing this post because Joy was touched personally by a tragic event that took place on Friday in the early hours of the morning. She lost a very close friend and law enforcement officer in Pittsburgh, PA by the name of Stephen Mayhle.

He was one of three officers killed in the line of duty in a stand off with the suspect known as Richard Poplawski. Officers Stephen Mayhle, Eric Kelly, and Paul Sciullo were killed responding to a domestic disturbance call. It seems that Poplawski was upset about losing his job, and the prospect of the Obama administration instituting a ban on guns.

This leads us to today’s topic of “A Parents Nightmare”. The nightmare I have about family is one about having to tell your children that one of their parents is dead. For the families of these three fallen heroes that nightmare has come true.

Now I don’t know about officers Kelly and Sciullo, but officer Mayhle is survived by his wife and two young daughters. His family was not even notified by the Pittsburgh Police until his wife called looking for him, because he was late returning home after his shift. She was informed by the department that she would have to come in to the station.

Joy and I cannot for one minute even begin to understand how the families of these fallen warriors feel, or how to tell their loved ones that these brave men will not be returning home especially their children. How do you tell children such a horrifying truth?

Now I will tell you that in my life I have lived through some dangerous life threatening situations and I never knew how it would have to be told to my children that I wasn’t coming home, luckily for me I don’t live that life anymore.

I do think that I have some idea of what I or my wife would say if it happened to one of us though. I think it would go something like this.

Example:
Kids come in here please and sit down I have some bad news and some good news for you to hear. First the bad news and that is that your mommy/daddy is not going to be coming home any more because he/she has passed away.

Now for the good news and that is that he/she has gone to a better place and is now with God. He/she wants you to know that they love you very much and wants you to live a full and happy life. He/she wants you kids to know that they can’t wait to see you when God says it is your time. Until then remember that he/she loves you with all of their heart for ever and ever.

That is how I think I would tell my kids that their mommy is gone and I think she would do the same for me. However I will say again that I we have no idea how the families of these men will tell the story to their kids, and all we can do is pray for them in their hour of need. I will further add that I would hope that God would extend to these families the mercy of brave hearts and souls.

I hope you all say a prayer for these men’s souls and their families also. Have a wonderful week and I will see you all again real soon, CIAO4NOW!!!!!

Hail Mary, full of grace.
Our Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the
paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the
shadow of death; I will fear no evil: for thou
art with me; thy rod and thy staff they
comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the
presence of mine enemies: thou anointest
my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all
the days of my life; and I will dwell in the
house of the Lord for ever.

Our Father which art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done in earth,
as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those
who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil:
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power, and the glory,
forever and ever.
Amen.

Hi again. Glad you took the time to drop by Parents R Us! Today for reference as well as laughs, I present to you a Parents Dictionary. I'm sure you'll recognize quite a few of the terms and you may even learn a few too.

-A-

Airplane - That thing parents act like to get toddlers to eat their carrots.

Alien - What you think invaded your home when your teen does chores on their own.

Apples - Fruit that is good for you. Usually passed by for something with sugar.


-B-

Bajillion - Number of times parents tell their kids to do something.

Bathroom - Everyone uses it but most have the idea (except for Mommy) that bathrooms clean themselves.

Because - A catch all reason parents give when kids ask "Why?"


-C-

Car - That thing your teen is always begging for.

China - paper plates

Cook - (see Mom)


-D-

Date - When Mom and Dad go out without the kids. Rarely occurs.


-E-

Ears - Kids keep a pound of dirt here.

Eating - Happens all the time except for at meals.

Energy - Mom has none, kids have plenty until time to do homework or chores.


-F-

Fables - Those tales teens tell to get out of various scraps.

Food - Answer of choice by parents when children ask "What's for dinner?"


-G-

Gum - Object attracted to both shoes and hair.


-H-

Hamper - Usually in the center of piles of dirty clothes with nothing in it.

Handy Wipe - Material closest to child's mouth.


-I-

Ice - Product of fiction. The ice tray is always empty. Strangely no one knows why.


-J-

Jeans - Clothing of choice for most kids

Junk - What's under your kids bed.


-K-

Ketchup - Favorite side of choice as well as most common stain in the house.

Kisses - Band-Aids from Mommy.


-L-

Lying - 50% of what comes out of your teens mouth.

Loser - The way your kids refer to their friends.


-M-

Makeup - Something mom's never use anymore and you forbid your daughter to wear.

Maybe - NO WAY.

Milk - Only consumed with large quantities of chocolate or sugary cereal.

Mom - (see Cook, Chauffer, Maid etc.)

MOMMMMM!!!!!!!!! - Frantic yell by a kid that wants something.


-N-

Naughty - Means Santa won't bring you presents.


-O-

Ocean - The state of the bathroom floor after family showers.


-P-

Pet - Wanted by kids - taken care of by parents.

Purse - Mom's bag of gear.


-Q-

Quietness - Myth


-R-

Refrigerator - Where your teen lives.


-S-

Screaming - Kids communication of choice.

Soap - All kids seem to be allergic to this.

Spoiled - Your kids after Grandma visits.


-T-

Teacher Conferences - When parents meet with teachers and find out about everything still hiding in your child's bookbag.

Towels - Kids idea of shower rug.


-U-

Underwear - Something kids often forget to change and run out of Sunday night at 10pm.


-V-

Vacation - Wishful thinking.


-W-

Wall - Drawing board for toddlers.

When Daddy Gets Home - Length of time until punishment occurs.


-X-

Xylophone - What every parents prays the grandparents won't get for the kids. (see Guitar, Drums, Musical Instruments)


-Y-

Yahoo - Exclamation of glee that the kids go back to school tomorrow. Also something most teens are addicted to.


-Z-

Zero - Amount of peaceful time parents have during the day.

Today at Parents R Us I want to take a bit of a different route than we usually do with our blog. Perhaps you could call this a parent "heart to heart."

I have to tell you, there are days that I'm not so sure why I'm writing this blog for parents. Here I am giving advice to other parents, and I'll admit I don't always feel I have it all together myself. LOL. However, this blog is all about us learning together and providing a place where parents can pick up tips, spend some time venting, or even get a good laugh.

More than likely you can identify with the way I feel. You've probably had days when you feel exactly like I do - like you don't know a thing about being a parent. Things are going along okay…you think you have the hang of things…and then something happens that lets you know you're just learning. Yeah…don't be self righteous out there. You've felt that way too!

Most of you know I'm a step parent. I've been at this now for going on a year and a half. There are some days I feel like I'm getting in the groove, getting the hang of the whole parenting thing, and then there are those days where I sit back and feel like I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Of course I don't let the kiddies know that though. I'm pretty good at acting like I know what I'm doing.

So, what do you do when you sit down and realize that parenting is still a mystery to you? Well, you keep going. Parenting isn't all about a short sprint - it's a long marathon. You get to about the 5 mile point of your 20 mile marathon and you feel like quitting. Muscles burn, you can barely breathe, and you don't feel like you can go on…but you do. It's like that with parenting. There are days your parenting "muscles" burn, you can't breathe, and you aren't sure how to go on, but you just keep on going!

While there are many things I don't know about being a parent, here are the things I DO know. I know that parenting is not for cowards. It's not for people who give up and quit. Parenting takes perseverance and it's not for the selfish. It is ALL about love. Okay, so maybe I'm not doing so bad here.

I know that practically every parent out there deals with these same feelings. Admit it…you know you do, lol. Just remember, you don't have to know what you're doing to be a good parent. As long as you don't quit on your kids, you're doing great. If you have moments like this, feel free to share. We'd love to hear what you have to say…so go ahead and vent.